My son is really into music – he has good taste in it and will talk your ear off about cord progressions if you let him. His current passion is listening to full albums (honestly, he’s a little snobby about it). For months he had read different lists of “the best albums of all time” – top 50 albums, best 100 albums, must listen to albums of this century, best rock albums of all time – there are many, many “best albums” lists out there. We enjoyed discussing the differences he was seeing in these lists so I finally asked him why he hadn’t started to listen to any of these lists. He said he just didn’t know where to start. So, we put our heads together, he found a list that met his standards, and I created a spreadsheet with the albums and the year they came out. And, because my son loves a competition, he turned it into a bracket system so that the 100th song is compared to the 1st song, and so on.
This list inspired…a lot of things:
Connection
My son is 15 years old and I tear up when I think of how few days he has left living under our roof. Anytime he is game to do something with us, I gladly jump at the opportunity. I also love music, but I love “my” music. And while the kid has great taste in music, and enjoys a lot of “my” music, he also enjoys more modern artists that I previously had ignored. Through this experience, we have found so much to discuss. It’s allowed him to be in the driver’s side of our conversations in new ways I hadn’t anticipated. I am learning from him, and he is an eager teacher.
It can be hard to find new ways to connect with people that we interact with often. While there is beauty in the day-to-day, it doesn’t always feel like meaningful connections are happening. The album list that we choose has all sorts of music on it – legends that I’ve heard in passing such as John Coltrane, non English speaking bands such as Fishmans, and surprising cult faves that are new to us such as King Crimson (who we are now both obsessed with). This process has been a great reminder that sometimes connection comes when both people are taken out of their every day and placed even slightly out of their comfort zone. With both of us knowing “some” but not “all” about this list, it leveled the playing field and allowed for freer and deeper conversations and connections.
Trying new things
I love it when a segue naturally happens! One of my big themes over the past few years has been to try new things. I’m not a dare devil, so these new things might not sound big and exciting to everyone, but the purpose has been to shift myself out of my comfort zone which was starting to feel like a rut, by intentionally trying new things. This can be as simple as trying a new restaurant or as big as joining a new networking group – or starting this newsletter! It’s been about saying yes, or at least, let me think about it, before saying no. This album list has been a perfect example of small ways I am expanding as a person and an observer of life.
There is pride, energy, and momentum in trying new things, and these don’t have to be big difficult new things. What makes you happy – how can you expand on it by incorporating new options into it? Similarly, what’s a rut you regularly find yourself in? It can start as simple as driving a new way to the grocery store and admire different houses or changing your radio station on the ride to work. When we try new things, we form new perspectives, we learn, grow and expand our horizons. In short, we’re more interesting people – to ourselves and to others – when we try new things. I love this article on the scientific benefits of trying new things. What’s one small new thing you can incorporate this week?
Being strategic when it comes to goals
One of the reasons I love lists is because they can be as simple or as complex as you want them to be. In 2024, one of my goals was to listen to all of Stephen Sondheim’s musicals and I created an unnecessarily complicated spreadsheet pulling each album into different weeks and days. About two months in, I scrapped the strict schedule, but I kept the list and continued to listen to each musical, finishing in early November. Over the years, I have created lists of Classic Movies I want to watch, restaurants I want to try – especially based on the season (Korean BBQ in the middle of a Chicago winter hits just right!) – This past summer, I created my own summer rom-com reading list to introduce me to new and diverse authors.
These might not sound like grand goals, but that’s what I love about lists, they can be used for anything. It’s not always important what’s on the list, what is important is that I now have a starting and end point that pushes me towards my goals, keeps me on track, and takes away some decision fatigue – what should I read next or where should we eat this weekend? Check the list! So if you are in a rut and want to learn or experience something new, start with a list of what that might look like, break those learnings or experiences down into smaller pieces and add them to your calendar! Think of all you can learn and experience in bite size pieces in 2025!
Reconnecting with JOY!
Whenever possible, lead with joy. I love music and art, I studied ballet for much of the first half of my life and music was a big part of that experience. But as life did it’s thing, I started to connect less and less with music. Because of this exercise, not only have I been inspired to listen to new things, I’ve reconnected with some longtime favorites that I’ve forgotten about. How can your goals reconnect you to what brings you joy?
Action Step Ideas:
- Journal about a connection you’d like to be more intentional about. What are some commonalities that you already have and how can you shake them up?
- What’s one new thing you can try this week? When will you do it? How do you feel after?
- What’s something fun you want to do more of? Create a list, find time on your calendar, and get started!